Date: Mon, 26 Nov 2001 09:55:00 -0500
From: Kelly Porpiglia 
Subject: A turkey-free MMC in 5 minutes

Ah, Thanksgiving dinner.  It's so nice to be able to sit down to a nice dinner
with friends and family.  However, not everyone realizes the suffering that
Thanksgiving imparts on many of us.  Yes, i'm talking about the leftover 
turkey.  It was so delicious and innocuous on Thursday, but now it's taking
over your fridge.  You've been doing _anything_ to get rid of it.  Turkey
sandwiches.  Turkey soup.  Turkey cake with turkey icing.  Ick.

As we all know, eating all this turkey makes you sleepy [1].  Since you just 
had a nice breakfast consisting of a turkey omlette and turkey juice, you're 
probably feeling mighty sleepy right about now.  If you can manage not to 
fall asleep in the next 5 minutes, then grab your mug, dump the remains of 
your turkey juice, wash out the mug (turkey juice and coffee is a nasty 
combination), and meander downstairs to grab some turkey-free coffee and your 
first turkey-less meal in four days (there will be no turkey cream cheese, we 


[1] Actually, turkey isn't what's making you so drowsy.  It does contain
the sleep-inducing tryptophan, but tryptophan doesn't act on the brain unless 
you take it on an empty stomach with no protein present.  You're probably
sleepy from eating a big meal and from alcohol.  Glutton/lush.
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