Date: Mon, 24 Nov 1997 09:58:03 -0500
From: Matteo Schmill 
Subject: Monday Morning

I don't think I need to remind anyone that it is monday morning, but
just in case:

	It's monday morning.

This means that there will be coffee, donuts, and bagels in the computer
science lounge at 10am. I am also told that several friendly Monday
Morning Coffee Collective members will be on the scene. Don't miss this
"once in a lifetime" opportunity.

This week I've decided to enclose a helpful checklist of writing tips. I
hope it will come in handy for the upcoming publication season.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

HOW TO WRITE GOOD
by Sally Bulford
(reprinted without permission from somewhere)

1.  Avoid alliteration.  Always.
2.  Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3.  Avoid cliches like the plague.  (They're old hat.)
4.  Employ the vernacular.
5.  Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
6.  Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
7.  It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
8.  Contractions aren't necessary.
9.  Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
10. One should never generalize.
11. Eliminate quotations.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate
    quotations.  Tell me what you know."
12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's
    highly superfluous.
14. Be more or less specific.
15. Understatement is always best.
16. One-word sentences?  Eliminate.
17. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
18. The passive voice is to be avoided.
19. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
20. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
21. Who needs rhetorical questions?
22. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
---------------------------------------------------