From: (Message Mistress and Meister)
Date: Mon, 16 Sep 1996 09:59:15 -0400 (EDT)

Greetings.  This week we have a melodious convocation, by our new messager:

        Message Mistress, quite contritious
        Where is it time to go?
        Ten chiming bells, sweet donut smells
        And coffee mugs all in a row.

Come to the lounge, where coffee is brewing and edible toroids await thee!

Hail the Coffee Collective!  Whether due to the infusion of new blood from
three members from the ssalc of 96 (aka newgrads96, not to confused with the
class of 69!), or the reaction to the poor performance of the now disgraced
outgoing collective, we have acquired a completely new Collective (with the
exception of yours truly, last active member of the comps generation, who,
like some elderly members of the US Senate, Supreme Soviet, and Chinese
Central Committee, lingers on, albeit in an increasingly trivial role).

Fare-well to the outgoing collective, led by the deposed monarch formerly
known as Shrikumar I, and his court of DD Supratik Bhattacharyya, BB John
V.E. Ridgway, and MM Cris Pedregal. May their retirements be peaceful.

In elections with record attendance (easy to do, as we don't keep any records) 
not only did we find suitable candidates for all offices, but we also held
what amounts to constitutional discussions.  Among the highlights: a mandate
for more, cheaper beer; the formation of a dissident Tea Party (more on this
forthcoming); and a 100% increase in the MMC Message budget.

Most important, the incongruence of the titles of the Coffee Collective came
to the fore: how is it possible that a "democratically elected" "Collective"
is full of royalty?  Thus, in keeping with changing times, and for truth in
advertising,  we respectfully suggest some titles for the officers:

 John Cavazos,  Coffee Chieftain  (fmly. Coffee Czar)
   Amy McGovern,  Bagel Babe (fmly. Bagel Baroness)
     Bryan Horling,  Donut Dude (fmly. Donut Duke)
        Jitu Padhye,   Beans Bum  (fmly. Bean Burgher) 
           Miranda Barrows,  Message Mistress (fmly. Message Meister)
               Cris Pedregal,   Message Mumbler (fmly. Message Meister)     

Welcome them all and raise your mugs to their successful tenure!

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