From JMCCARTHY@cs.umass.EDU Mon Dec 3 12:23:03 1990
By popular demand, we have increased our bagel supply to
4 dozen this week, plus 4 choices of spreads ... plus the
usual 3 dozen donuts and plenty of coffee. Come on down!
(I usually leave things out 'til 1:00, so you can come back
for more.) Joe.
[And now some words from our MMC Messager, Jay Corbett:]
This week: Our own distinguished professor Orif Barrubgtib has
discovered one of the lost dialogs of Plato, related
to The Crito and The Phaedo, which I feel is relevant
to our Monday morning activity. For your edification, I
shall reproduce a section below.
THE EXPRESSO
by Plato
Lobotomos: Is it true, Socrates, that the decaffeinated life is not
worth living?
Socrates: Not only is it true, Lobotomos, but upon careful reflection it is
patent. For is not reason the foundation of virtue?
Lobotomos: Certainly, Socrates.
Socrates: And without virtue, there would be no reason.
Lobotomos: Of course, Socrates.
Socrates: And reason requires wakefulness.
Lobotomos: No one could possibly deny it, Socrates.
Socrates: And it is quite impossible to be truly awake on a Monday morning
without caffeine.
Lobotomos: How truly you speak, Socrates.
Socrates: Thus virtue ergo reason needs wakefulness via caffeine. Q.E.D.
Lobotomos: I see now that must certainly be the case, Socrates.